Love Inflation
Monday, January 21st, 2008Citigroup and several other investment banks have announced profit losses against a backdrop of depressed market sentiment and fears of an impending recession. There is also so much to say about the rising oil prices and the continued devaluation of the sterling (and the dollar) against the peso.
Last I heard, the peso is trading at P80 to the pound. For those of you who regularly send remittances to the Philippines, this is tantamount to your salary being slashed by 20% from when the pound used to be pegged at P100.
However, this is the month of love and while these economic concerns affect us in the short and medium-term, I’d loath to be labelled cold-hearted by not using this column to herald tributes to that magical and wondrous thing called love.
After all, if there is one thing we Filipinos can be proud of, it is our sense of compassion which is manifested in the stories of thousands of nurses, caregivers, and domestic staff across the UK caring daily for patients, children and the elderly.
I could make an argument that being in business is no different from being in a romantic relationship.
Both begin with an idea. Before embarking on a business, one must have a sense of what the business is about and how the business is to be carried out. Similarly, each one of us would have aspirations on what we are looking for in a relationship. For me, it would be a disarming smile, an open mind, and an indulgent heart. Other people may have strict ‘presentational’ or even ‘size-of-wallet’ requirements.
I could make a further argument that like businesses, relationships need to be nurtured – tenderly and regularly. They are like trees that bear fruit when properly cared for. Or they wilt pitifully when neglected.
Like in business, relationships require the ability to compromise. It is rare that parties would be in complete harmony in terms of each other’s needs and wants. A lot of times, finding a middle ground for agreement is the key for being able to move positively on.
It is also fair to say that like businesses, relationships undergo challenges and conflicts. Some of these can be anticipated. Most come when least expected.
And like business endeavours, relationships have a high rate of failure. New businesses have a failure rate of as high as 80% in the first 3-4 years. But I’m afraid my failure rate in relationships may be a little higher. I can say the same for millions of other single men and women who’ll be spending this coming Valentine’s Day without the company of sweethearts.
This brings me to my point.
It is quite a challenge to find true love these days. It is not because people don’t want to fall in love. Nor can this be attributed to lack of choices.
A myth made famous by a romantic-comedy movie is that all eligible men are taken and all the rest are gay. Of course not.
Similarly ludicrous is the notion that women who have gone unmarried at 30 are past their sell-by date. Baloney.
Yet, people complain repeatedly that it is easier to find a needle in a haystack than to find true love.
On the other hand, given the advances in technology, there isn’t a shortage of avenues for seeking attention and finding those who seek it. Dating sites, singles bars, internet forums and chat portals are crowded with like-minded individuals wanting to be swept off their feet. Even in free papers distributed daily in cities and towns across the UK, pages are devoted to lists of people searching for paramours.
Perhaps it is this preponderance of choice that is the cause of the problem. We live in a society where we are able to interact with hundreds of people daily that we now tend to regard relationships as merely commodities. It is very easy to transmit words and sentences by emails, text, and anonymous posts that we tend to not mean what we say and not say what we truly mean.
We are suffering from love inflation.
Inflation in economic terms is defined as the increase in the price of the set of goods over a period of time. There are two major schools of thought on the cause of inflation. The ‘monetarists’ view is that the more paper bills and coins there are in circulation, the lower their value is. The ‘Keynesians’ view that is that the prices of goods go up (and by inference, the value of money goes down) due primarily to demand.
So going back on the subject of love, from a monetarist point of view, we tend not to allow ourselves to fall in love thinking there are a ‘lot more fishes’ out there in the big sea. From a Keynesians point of view, we tend to demand more and more of the people we meet and rather than having an open mind, we give excuses like, ‘He is not rich enough’, ‘She can’t cook’, etc…
Why can’t it be simpler?
I have fond memories of my grandfather narrating how he prodded my father to pursue my mother when they saw her pass by their little house in the province. My father took 3 long years to finally get my mother to say ‘yes’. And although, there were probably just a dozen maidens in the village that time, my father persevered and did not look at any other woman until he got that golden affirmation. My mother held out for 3 long years not because she was expecting to find someone else but because it was fashionable during their time to make the men ‘work for it’.
Such romantic stories seem out-of-date but they do give us a hint that perhaps we should not find love in other people but within us.
This month of February, for those who haven’t found anyone yet, do not despair. Like in business, your chances of success increase the more you try.
For those who already have special someones but are not as happy as they’d like to be, bask in the warmth of your darlings embrace and be reminded that there are millions not so fortunate who’ll be chilling in the February cold.
For those lucky couples in blissful relationships, find a way to top the magic in your romance. Flowers are optional but highly recommended.
Happy Valentines everyone!